What did the calculator say to the student?
You can count on me.
Tag: #school
Browse jokes in this category.
What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school?
Bison.
What's the worst thing about ancient history class?
The teachers tend to Babylon.
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology.
Do not read it!
Why do mathematicians hate the U.S.?
Because it's indivisible.
Why did the m&m go to school?
Because it wanted to be a Smartie!
I couldn't get a reservation at the library.
They were completely booked.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in schools!
I went to a book store and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was, she said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.
Still funny.
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?
" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
I got an A on my origami assignment when I turned my paper into my teacher
Still funny.
It's been months since I bought the book "how to scam people online".
It still hasn't turned up.
I was at the library and asked if they have any books on "paranoia", the librarian replied, "yes, they are right behind you"
Still funny.
What's the worst part about being a cross-eyed teacher?
They can't control their pupils.
Where do you learn to make banana splits?
At sundae school.
When I left school, I passed every one of my exams with the exception of Greek Mythology.
It always was my achilles elbow
What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
Where did you learn to make ice cream?
Sunday school.
I've just been reading a book about anti-gravity, it's impossible to put down!
Still funny.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
It's ok, he woke up.
I'm reading a book on the history of glue – can't put it down.
Still funny.
What do you call a troublesome Canadian high schooler?
A poutine.
What's Forest Gump's Facebook password?
1forest1
A book just fell on my head.
I only have my shelf to blame.
I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome.
It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I liked it.
Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems.